Archive

Archive for the ‘Snapshots of Me’ Category

Breaking Free (Part 3)

September 5, 2009 Leave a comment

It’s been a month now since I posted Part 1 and Part 2 of this blog. In case you didn’t read those entries or can’t remember, here is a recap: Approximately two months ago, I made a decision to get rid of 70% to 90% of my possessions. In part two, I posted photos of the “To Give Away”, “To Keep”, and “To Sort” piles. I also mentioned that I had my cell phone temporarily turned off so that I could fast from my “Everything” plan.

Now that you are caught up, here is the latest.

As indicated previously, I kept my phone off for only one week, but I downgraded my plan to just allow for a limited number of calling minutes and text messages. I no longer have a data plan which means no more Facebook, GPS, email, Dodger games, etc. on my phone. I am still having withdrawals but it is definitely for the better. My kids certainly have benefited from it. During a trip to a theme park when I still had the “Everything” plan, I was checking the status of the Dodger game every 10 minutes! It was difficult for me to make the right decision but it proved even more difficult to act it out. My cell phone service provider does not allow people with fancy phones like mine to downgrade their plans online. They expect us to use the data plans. So, I had to call them. That didn’t work out so well either because they kept having “computer problems”. My call even got mysteriously disconnected once before they were able to downgrade me! In any case, it’s all done now.

Regarding the three piles, the “To Sort” pile is long gone. I now have a “To Keep” pile that is two to three boxes bigger than before, and there are only a handful of items in the “To Give Away” pile that I still need to give away. Most of the boxes went to the Salvation Army, but several bigger items went to even better use. A friend of mine needed a computer so she got my old Mac. Even better than that, though, is that the same week that I sorted most of this stuff out, a homeless couple I know acquired a new home and needed to fill it. Having been homeless for several years, they had almost nothing. Now they have my old TV stand, one of my desks, some of my old DVDs and books, a lot of my kitchenware, and lots of other things! A friend of mine helped me deliver my stuff plus some of her own things that she no longer needed. I must say that there aren’t many joys greater than the one you experience when you show up with a truck full of goodies in the middle of the projects in Watts. We felt a bit like Saint Nicholas or something!

Before writing this blog entry, I dropped all of the remaining “Give Away” boxes at the Goodwill. Before I loaded them into my car, I double checked them. Although I don’t think it to be completely horrible, I am at little dismayed that I pulled some things back out of these boxes so that I can keep them. I have been wrestling with this question: “Me and my possessions, who owns who?”

Be sure to read Part 1 and Part 2 of this Blog too.

Advertisements

Too Self-Absorbed to Care

July 19, 2009 Leave a comment

2 million children under 14 years old are HIV positive“The essential feature of irony is the indirect presentation of a contradiction between an action or expression and the context in which it occurs.”

I live in Orange County, and I recently heard that if Orange County were it’s own country, it would be the 5th wealthiest country in the world. Earlier this week, I was invited to attend a fund raising event for some organizations whose goal is not only to raise awareness of dire issues in Africa and other parts of the world but also to do something about it.

Tonight I attended the event which was held at a local outdoor mall. The event took place in an area about the size of half a football field. The central focal point of the event was a stage where a handful of musicians performed songs to entertain the crowd. Behind the stage was a Ferris wheel. Read more…

Breaking Free (Part 2)

July 12, 2009 Leave a comment

Earlier this week, I wrote Breaking Free Part 1 in which I describe my decision to get rid of 70% to 90% of my possessions. So far I am making decent progress sorting through the “keep” and “give away” piles. However, this has already been a very emotionally draining process. I am discarding books that I have been wanting to read for years but haven’t and throwing away photographs that I have only looked at once or twice before. One wall of my living room is lined with furniture plus seven boxes to give away. A smaller wall is lined with things that I am keeping (currently two bookshelves, nine boxes, a lamp, and a poster). I still have over 20 boxes to sort through. 😦 Read more…

Breaking Free (Part 1)

July 8, 2009 Leave a comment

In a classic Aesop’s Fable entitled “The Miser”, a man buries a piece of gold in the ground and then comes to visit it every few days to gloat over it. Someone figures out what he’s up to, digs up the gold, and takes off with it. When the man eventually comes back to gloat over his gold, he finds it missing and immediately has a panic attack. A passerby sees the man freaking out and inquires about the situation. Upon hearing the details, the passerby says “Take a stone and put it in the earth instead. … For, as far as I can see, even when the gold was there you made no use of it.”

My parents divorced while I was a sophomore in high school and I moved out with my mom thus beginning my life as a nomad. Since that year, the longest time I have spent in a single residence is two-and-a-half years, with an average of one residence per year. I learned quickly to not bother unpacking my boxes. To complicate matters, I have acquired stuff from two of my grandmothers, both of my parents plus a stepmother, and several ex-roommates. Oh yes, and let’s not forget about birthdays, Christmas, tax documents, etc. Needless to say, I have acquired a great deal of useful but unused stuff over the years, most of which is perpetually stored in boxes.

I am always throwing away unusable items, and I have had yard sales, used eBay, and more to get rid of some of the other stuff. But some stuff is just really difficult to sell and too valuable to throw away. So, three or four years ago, after yet another move, I decided to start giving away all of my useful but unused stuff to places like the Goodwill. In that time, I have given away 30 to 40 boxes, or roughly $2000 to $2500 worth, of stuff. It has been painful every single time, yet also unexplainably freeing.

A series of recent events combined with what I have just shared with you have caused an idea to form in my head that I am going to act on. You could say it’s an experiment, but it’s not one that can be easily undone if it goes awry. In the short-term it is very painful and time-consuming. I am giving away, and possibly selling, all of my stuff (used and unused) except for what I can fit into a single bedroom! This means I am getting rid of a 32-inch TV plus stand, an extra bed, 100s of CDs, over 50 books (many of which are classics), DVDs and VHS tapes, and on and on. I will still have to keep some boxes to store financial records and such, but my hope is that doing all this will be like taking chains off of my hands, feet, and chest.

This immense weight that I have been carrying all these years will be lifted and I should be freed.

Here Today, Gone Tomorrow

April 6, 2009 Leave a comment

I did an unusual thing this morning. I drove to work and then had my morning quiet time with God. So there I was sitting in the driver seat of my yellow hatchback near the edge of a parking lot that is sandwiched between a strawberry field and a quarter-mile-wide warehouse in an industrial section of Irvine. I started by praying about the news I expect from one of my bosses today. You see, I learned last week from one of my other bosses than we should be expecting news of more lay-offs in our department today. In fact, last Wednesday, some good people I know were let go from their position in another department, with very little warning. At least I was given a heads up. I am told that no matter what happens, I should expect at the very least to be asked to take a “vacation” in April. After praying this morning I opened my Bible and found myself in Ecclesiastes 5. Among other things, this passage talks about how God is in Heaven and we are here on Earth. Our words are senseless chatter in comparison to His limitless wisdom. Therefore, my words should be few as I stand in awe of Him. Read more…

Steven

April 27, 2006 Leave a comment

This story takes place over ten years ago and so some of the details have gotten hazy with age. Perhaps after reading this, my brother can offer some additional insight.

During my freshman year of high school I attended a private Christian school. That same year, my younger brother Daniel was in seventh grade and attended a private Lutheran school. My parents were still together and I regularly attended a youth group called “Highlife” that was closely affiliated with my school.

For those that are completely unaware or only partially familiar, the youth group that I attended involved singing upbeat songs (similar to those sang in Church, but not hymns), playing some sort of group game, small group activity and discussion, and a message (like a sermon). It was a place to have fun with fellow Christian teens and learn something extra about God that I had not already learned from school, church, parents, or elsewhere. Although the “God stuff” was great, most of us simply saw it as an excuse to hang out with friends on a Wednesday night.

My mom shifted jobs a lot, but, at the time of this story, had been renting an office space inside of a local carpet store where she could run her interior design business. The owner of the carpet store was divorced, his ex-wife lived in Los Angeles somewhere, and they had joint custody of a teenage boy named Steven. The owner was so busy with his work that he seldom had time to be with his son.

Apparently, there were some parental issues at Steven’s mom’s place too because Steven had gotten himself involved in gangs. I had seen movies like “Colors” and “Boys in the Hood”, but I knew enough at the time to know that I knew nothing. To this day, I still don’t really understand what it means to be in a gang. I am not sure exactly how it came about, but somehow every parent involved decided that it would be a good idea for Steven to live with us for a week or so and share a room with my brother and me! I have already told you about the differences between Steven and my brother and I. It was like the pilgrims coming to America and meeting the “Indians”. We were from completely different worlds and neither understood the other. Read more…

Categories: Snapshots of Me Tags: , ,

Letting Go

April 8, 2006 Leave a comment

My parents have raised my brothers and I to be independent people. That was somewhat intentional but also somewhat unavoidable. Although both of my parents had jobs, our family had very little money. That meant that they could hardly afford a sitter but also couldn’t be home with us themselves. That left my brothers and I lots of time to roam the neighborhood and get into all sorts of trouble. We were allowed to make our own mistakes and were forced to deal with the consequences on our own.

By independent, I do not mean that I do not rely on other people. I mean that I can make do on my own and adjust to new situations better than many people I know. However, I am aware of my own limitations as well as my desire to connect with other people.

I moved to Orange County nearly two years ago. Prior to the move, I had been married for quite a while and had allowed many relationships to drift away so that I could focus on my family. I did maintain a handful of friendships but made no effort to create new ones. When I moved to OC, I was suddenly without my friends and shortly thereafter was without my wife. That made my two kids my new best friends. I am still re-learning how to make new friends and have actually made a stronger effort to stay in touch with some of my long-distance friends but, for the most part, have been content to just spend as much quality time with my kids as possible. Read more…

Categories: Snapshots of Me Tags: , , ,